I have been sleeping at B's house for the past few days. Nothing much.. We went to the park to layan his lil sister, Ain. We played in the slide, hide and seek and all.. Feel like kanak-kanak ribena's! LOL...

Then yesterday, we went to Fly fm's birthday bash.. Baby's so call uncle was performing... That is Bass Agents. Hahahahha...

Owh ya! Did i tell you that Uptown Hardstyle members took a picture with the famous DJ? GANJAGURU!

Now is 6.21 am and im still awake. I just don't know why i can't sleep. Baby is having Agama papers today and at 12.10 i'll be going to school to meet him. With all of the sudden i feel like going to Sabah but i just don't know when and also how to get the money to go. Per person is about RM 500. And i have been thinking to take Baby along to teman me.. For my money i can just ask from Wan. But as for B's.. I think we have to find a way..

As i was hanging out in my room just now i was sitting down and staring at the floor. I know i was thinking but I just don't know about what. Then i saw my parents old pictures. I took it and i stared at it. I felt like i wanted to cry but i don't know whether i want to or not. I just don't know what i felt.. Whether i was sad or angry. But one thing i know what i felt... I felt unhappy of the situation of my family. Looking at the picture made me think what happen to their love that was glooming the days. They look so happy. But what happens now and what will happen later?

Family Potrait

I see everything is so wrong now. There are times that i just have to smoke 3 times after 1. I feel so stressed up and maybe i am in shit condition. I'll smoke while i cry. I'll cry while i smoke. Thinking..wat actually happen to my family? Everything is falling apart. God knows how mummy is handling it. I just don't know if she is happy..I think she is. Daddy, i know you are happy. You are having Emily at Sabah. Yes i do know her name already. Itried adding her at friendster but she rejected me. And i felt upset coz is it so wrong to approve the daughter of the father that she is going out with? As for me, i know im really Unhappy. I feeli like there's nothing left for me in the family. Not much love that i can feel from daddy. Only i can only admit that Haniza is my mother and Razman is my father. Is that all i can admit?

I just don't know whether to blame it on Emily daddy.. If i blame it on her, i always remind my self how happy you are with her. She may look young ( i think she is, she must be), but i know age doesn't really matter.

Daddy... I feel so lonely now. There are times i feel like running away coz it doesn't make much difference if im at home. I'll be doing my own things while middle of the night i'll be smoking while crying thinking what has happen to the happy family i saw when i was a little girl. And that thought continues.....

I love HIM! :)

There are times i would just sit down and think bout my life; thinking who loves me and who don't. First, the people that will always love me is my Family.. Second.. haha... i always thought that i could play this guy out and i always thought he is not the right one for me. Even i broke up with him 3 times, he was still waiting for me.. I have no idea why he did that.. But in te end, i found out he cared about me like no one can and he makes me happy like there's no more space for me to smile at my face. Yaya... You get me lah!

Haha.... This guy's name is... MOHD ALIFF BIN MOHD SAUPI. There are times he buys me gifts.. And 100% i love it! This is the picture of our potrait that we did at Central Market and pics of the things that he bought for me..

Blargh!!!!!!

How should i start this blog? Well.. Im not a blogger freak now as i just don't know why i don't have the mood for it. Looking at my mum's blog at Wordpress is kinda cool... But im trying to figure out how the hell do you actually read each of her blog. It's all sort of tunggang terbalik kinda tingy.

Baby is having SPM at the moment. And i see him so relaxed and cool while im the one that's freaking out like im the one that will be facing exams. Good luck for him as he will be facing English paper 2moro.

As for my parents...

I just dunno where or how or how to start. Everything seems to be messed up.

I am just feeling confused like someone stole a candy from a little girl. And in the end, you just burst out in tears. Everyone is just piling up shits on me and say like "Oh this shit is not good for you, you should try this shit." While the other person says "Why should you listen and take the shit that person gives you? Throw that shit away and take a different kind of shits." Or better still "Why are you having shits? You shouldn't be holding shits cause you are not a FREAKIN' TOILET!!!"

Well... actually the last one is what i thought la.. As i said... I feel like im at the middle and i hear all sorts of whines, mumbles, grumbles, and especially lies. All that combines together becomes you know what... SHITS.

Fun!

Enough of the stories for once.. This is the space for me to put just pictures!! And see what's new..

Soon, this will be our new logo... Thanks to Udin.